I got my first bra from Sinterklaas. Well, of course I knew better, but in my time there was still a bit of a taboo on bras, I think. It was therefore not a padded bra but a white Sloggi, without filling. Angry I was! I was about 10 years old and I felt like myself. Or in my bra 😉 . Nowadays I would have also become angry if I had such a bra as a child. No, I want a filled cup / padded bra in a nice color or with a bold print on it! These are for sale at HEMA and Bijenkorf and "everyone wears them at school, mom!"
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Now I was physically developed early as a child, so that gift from Sinterklaas was not so crazy after all. But to have your child wear a padded bra as a 10-year-old? What signal do we send to our daughters? That you should already have breasts at that age? And that it's bad if you haven't developed it yet at that age? That you are no longer allowed to see nipples on girls of ten years old? Or am I just being frantic?
According to the AD , Willeke Bezemer, sexologist, says that it is a form of hypersexualization in girls. Hypersexualization has to do with portraying and treating girls as sexual objects. Think, for example, of Miss pageants for children or the children's thong. And that doesn't seem to be good for their self-image.
Young girls compare their bodies with others early on. From the age of 6 they can already be dissatisfied with their body. Do you stimulate young girls' dissatisfaction with their bodies with padded bras or do you give them something to feel secure? And would you go along with that as a parent?
With all the media outlets today, there are so many more idols to compare yourself to. I see it in Daughter (7) who already thinks herself too fat. Too thick! Girl, my baby fat slowly went up when I was nine years old, forming breasts and hips. Fortunately, she now regularly says that:“You used to be like that too, Mom?”. “Yes honey, don't worry. Just keep exercising and eat healthy." Yet as a mother I see this with sorrow and hope to make her realize how beautiful, special, talented and sweet she is. That that little bacon layer doesn't matter, every body is different. I hope that's enough for her not to develop an eating disorder.
Back to the 'padded bra' for girls. I'm glad there are at least no push-up bras hanging next to the heart bottoms (yet). I can hear Daughter say to her friend in 2.5 years:“Hey, don't you ask your mother for such a push-up bra? Then they really do look bigger. My mother does too.” Because yes, girls of that age feel big and want to wear 'grown-up clothes'. Just like mom.
As a young girl I would have preferred such a beautiful padded bra from Sinterklaas than a white Sloggi without underwire. And certainly if more girls in group 8 wore such a bra. For me it was those short tops that were completely hip as a shirt. I felt completely 'the bomb' when my parents finally gave me such a top. So yes, I understand those ten-year-old girls. However, as a ten-year-old I would not have been aware that this could be looked at in a sexual way.
As a parent, I am. Although the bras are not lace, I must say that honestly. But I think 10 is really too young, a year or 12/13 already sounds better to me. Now that I'm on the other end of the line, I'm glad this issue isn't an issue for Daughter yet. I see even more 'cons' than 'pros', but I'm not completely negative about it either. Because to be honest:I also find the padded bras much more comfortable. One thing I do know:she won't get it from Sinterklaas 😉 .
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*Used image from Shutterstock
