Take the leap? Or not ? And to change what? The breasts, the tip of the nose, the shape of the chin? Does the finesse of your mouth (proof of an innate sense of aesthetics, si, sie) really bother you? And above all, why? Here is the question that tickles:what are the real reasons that push to intervene on the body and the face? It can be, and it is often the case, to settle a big complex, an (almost) detail that "clutters", even if it does not prevent you from living and feeling generally good in your life. This is the case of Laurence who, at 38, had her breasts redone after two pregnancies:“I wanted to get back the chest I had at 30, without adding an extra cup. Today, I am delighted, because she looks like she would have if breastfeeding had not damaged her. The operation comforted me. In fact, now I don't even think about it anymore..." Forgot the operation? No ! Forget the complex. In Laurence's case, the surgery was liberating. On the other hand, if we are in a search for perfection, in a quest for love and recognition (when I am more beautiful, people will love me more), mistrust. “An act that aims to modify, a little or a lot, the appearance becomes dangerous when we have the feeling that it will change our life, our way of being and our relationship to others, explains Sophie Cadalen, psychoanalyst . Dangerous? Yes, because inevitably disappointing:it is not a stroke of the scalpel that revolutionizes the foundations of being. Such an approach can on the contrary isolate from the real relationship in which, ultimately, the body and the appearance are not so important "(we don't care about the wrinkles of the neighbor or the big buttocks of Suzette, right?). Moreover, others often (not systematically, but often) have a benevolent look at us. When one feels depreciated, all the time and by everyone, it is the other in the imaginary sense, that is to say... oneself (eh, yes), who lacks objectivity, kindness and perspective. To decide whether or not to intervene on one's appearance and ensure the success of such an approach, the body should not be considered as an outcome (=when I am thin, I will be happy). In other words, it is better to avoid burdening the intervention with what it will not resolve and to remain within the principle of reality by accepting that aesthetics does not transform the psyche, the course of life, the relationship to oneself and to others. Moreover, the most attractive and assertive people are not necessarily first prize winners for beauty (the Beast of Beauty, well...). It is their life energy, their way of moving, thinking and being that makes them attractive. Not their D cup (especially Mick Jagger). Doctor Matteoli, plastic surgeon, specifies that "the success of an intervention is linked to the fact that it must be done at the right time (not when you are anxious or have too many worries) and respond to the right indication. Sometimes, that is not possible:the technique, as advanced as it is, cannot always fulfill the patient's desire. It may also be that the operation is too heavy and too risky compared to what the woman can gain from it. In plastic surgery, there is never any urgency or obligation. It is up to the practitioner to get the message across when all the conditions are not met to ensure the success of an operation”. To be prettier and to feel better in your body, we are for it. But not at any price…
